Quotable Quotes from Gaming Life

A lot of gaming quotes are really only funny in context. I know it, you know that. Some gamers don't.

Then, there are some gaming quotes that are funny regardless. May I direct your attention to: Out of Context D&D

We frequently have D&D going in my household (well, Pathfinder), but we've also had Shadow Run and most recently Fading Suns going on in our gaming group. I thought I'd wade through and find some gems from there.

30 Days of D&D Day 30: Best DM You've Had

Well, it's the last day of the 30 day D&D challenge. I'm glad you came on this journey with me....it ended up being far more nostalgic at times than I'd anticipated!

So today I'm talking about the best DM I've had. It occurs to me that throughout the month, I never actually mentioned what "DM" stood for; I assumed you'd known the lingua franca. But, "DM" means Dungeon Master. It's a role which also might, depending on the system, be referred to as the Game Master or the Storyteller. Same dude. He's the one telling the story, the one who comes up with the setting (if not using one of the published ones), the one who runs the NPC's (non player characters), the one who runs the enemies and monsters when combat occurs.

Characters are important, but the DM is obviously the lynchpin of the whole deal. We players can make our own fun, certainly, but the DM's descriptions and stories are what keep us coming back and rolling those dice. And the best DM I've had? It's my fiancé, Jim.

30 Days of D&D Day 29: What is the number you always seem to roll on a d20?

 What number do I always seem to roll?

I seem to roll 14's an awful lot.

Some nights, though, it's 7. Or 6. Or 4.

Other nights? I'll get a natural 20 not once, not two times, but three times. Four if I'm super lucky.

That's the funny thing about the dice. They're random, and that randomness seems fickle. A low rolling night will follow a high rolling night. Or some characters are never lucky, until, say, you get dominated and start killing your fellow party members. Other characters are extremely lucky, even missing out on that early levels clumsiness we're so typically faced with.

So 14 isn't such a bad number to roll. Depending on what you're adding, it's more than sufficient.

30 Days of D&D Day 27: A character you want to play in the future

Oh boy, there's any number of characters I want to play in the future. Infinity characters.

More tieflngs, of course. I mean, they're right there in the core book! Why not, right? And also more fighters, of course. As I said, I haven't made one in 5th yet (though I did draw the fighter in the quickstart, but we only did 1 session of that? 2?)

30 Days of D&D Day 23: Least Favorite Monster Overall

My least favorite monster? Let me tell you a story about my least favorite monster.

I've talked about Brigid in many of the posts her. She was my formative D&D character, the Return to the Temple of Elemental Evil game really my formative D&D experience. It is what it is. This has been a fabulous nostalgia train, actually.

30 Days of D&D Day 21: Favorite Dragon Color/Type

It's funny that it took 'til day 21 to reach the "dragons" in "Dungeons and Dragons". Granted, they might not be something every party faces. But not a single dragon fight I've been involved with is ever easy, and I could think of 10 off the top of my head. There were almost certainly more. When a critter is as big as dragons tend to be it has a lot of attacks. When a critter can fly and the players (frequently) can't, that adds another dimension to the battlefield, and another advantage on their side.

30 Days of D&D: Day 20: Favorite Monster (Humanoid/Natural/Fey)

I've actually had very, very little dealings with the fey in context of D&D. Like, there was a grig in one Pathfinder game (we were actually trying to do the Temple again, if I remember right) wherein I was playing a fey blooded sorcerer. But the grig was only a very small part of the story, not the main focus in any way. He was a nifty little guy, anyway. If I was inclined to run games, I might do a fey-oriented story, but I find I'm much better at writing stories than telling them.

I think my favorite humanoid  (is it natural? whatever) monster might be the gnoll. Gnolls are, essentially, hyena people. Which can be very interesting when you consider it, since hyenas are very female dominated, and even scientists who study them have trouble differentiating between males and females. Depending on your DM, the gnolls then might be a roving female band of marauders, which is like equal opportunity monstering. Depending on alignment and culture, they might be available as a playable race in a game. If they're adversarial, they might also do things like have hyenas they use in combat/keep as pets/whatever like the hyena men in Africa.

Additionally, There's another kind of gnoll, or a cooler kind of gnoll, called the Flind, which tends to be more intelligent if a bit smaller,. and they even have their own special weapon called the flindbar which is a bit like nunchaku I guess but don't tell them.

30 Days of D&D Day 19: Favorite Monster (Elemental/Plant)

My favorite D&D Monster that is a plant is the myconid.  They're technically a fungus, being a mushroom, but close enough for government work right?

I actually haven't run into them very many times. Once in a game in the steam world, where we were all fighters (which is a very interesting kind of game to set up and play, actually. There's a lot of variation and individual characterization there). My character soloed one, as the others were dealing with a Displacer Beast. I felt kind of bad, actually, as he (it?) seemed rather mournful. But when monsters attack you in D&D, you tend to fight back so your character survives.

Once in the game where I played Agatha (that was the game where Snik made his appearance), the party got directions down the continent from one. And most recently, the party stumbled into an underground mushroom cave that was the myconid's food farm. At least I think that was a myconid.

But. Mushroom people. They're really different. They're not necessarily an automatic violent adversary. They don't have an anatomy which you would expect.

30 Days of D&D Day 18: Favorite Monster (Immortal/Outsider)

When it comes to Outsiders, there are several I like, but a couple which really stand out.

I already discussed tieflings, which are actually considered "native outsiders" (well, provided you're playing on the plane on which said individual was born. A tiefling born in Sigil but come to the Forgotten Realms, say, would be a plain ol' outsider I guess). The other side of the tiefling coin is aasimar, which are people descended from angelic influence rather than demonic or devilish. They have similar abilities (light instead of darkness, a different handful of small elemental resistances, etc.) and though they don't have a rad historic d100 table you can roll on (that I know of) you can kind of extrapolate; vestigial wings might be white-feathered instead of batty, as an example. That kind of thing.

Other than that, though, I really like Night Hags. Hags in general, I guess. We've had a couple of games which featured them heavily, and they're a thematic I enjoy. They have all that terrifying folkloric flavor I tend to enjoy, and are also not a terribly overdone beastie. They're powerful without seeming unable to be overcome, they're sinister and intelligent and more than capable of reason and diplomacy. They're a great baddie to have, because depending on the party, maybe they can just get along? But if they don't, it's sure to be an interesting and ruthless fight.

30 Days of D&D Day 16: Favorite Monster (aberration)

My favorite D&D monster which is an aberration is the Cloaker.

It's one of my lifelong game goals to make friends with a cloaker that I will then wear as a cloak, and it'll be my buddy that watches my back in battle and in tight situations.

Cloakers are kind of nasty beasts to fight, in that they'll wrap somebody up entirely, grappling them, and it's possible it'll just strangle that person to death while they're in its clutches. It's then particularly difficult for the other people in the party to fight because, well, few of us like stabbing our friends.

30 Days of D&D Day 15: Favorite Monster (Undead)

What is my favorite Undead Monster? Well, I do warn you, as a player and not a DM I'm going to perhaps have different insight on the monstery end of things.

Well. I was actually a little surprised to find I had one which came immediately to mind: the ghoul. They're humanoid undead which has a paralytic touch, a pretty bad stench, and a long terrifying tongue with which to lick the marrow from bones.

30 Days of D&D Day 14: Favorite NPC

My favorite NPC (non player character) is a fighter named Agnor we picked up in the Fire Temple (I think) of the Return to the Temple of Elemental evil. He'd been a mercenary, and was doing it for the pay, not because he'd believed in raising the ultimate evil to come and rule the world or whatever. So he surrendered and then ended up coming along with our adventuring party as we sallied forth through the rest of the temples, and eventually he and Brigid hooked up. He's the reason Brigid didn't end up killing the party's wizard during a vampire fight, when the vampire case "Dominate" on her, she of course failed the save, and got to stabbin'; Agnor ended up getting her into a grapple before the final damage was done. But anyway, I'm sure after we "won" the Temple, they rode off into the sunset and lived happily ever after, as retired adventurers do. They do, right?

Though we've had other magnificent and memorable ones.

30 Days of D&D Day 13: Favorite Trap/Puzzle

Let's see, my favorite trap or puzzle. Though my favorite play location is in fact ruins, and that seems like the most likely place to find traps and puzzles, I had to rack my brain a bit for this one.

And really, it's an odd question, because I find traps to more of a "I hope this doesn't kill me/us" far more than "ooh, a puzzle!"

30 Days of D&D Day 10: Craziest thing that's happened to you that you saw

 

The craziest thing that's happened to you that you saw (to party/character/your players, etc.).

This one is no contest. Though I'll also give you a runnerup.

30 Days of D&D Day 9: Favorite Character You Haven't Played

I at first thought this was worded kind of oddly, "favorite character you haven't played", but I figured it out. We're frequently required to interpret the wording on things.

30 Days of D&D Day 3: Favorite Playable Class

Fighter. Hands down, my favorite playable class for a very long time has been fighter.

The first character I put on paper, but did not play, was a human fighter who was escaping fighting pit slavery. The character I played to the highest level  I've to date attained was a human fighter. It was a great class for me to learn the D&D systems, learn how combat and the battlefield worked, and be able to have a pretty straight dotted line when it came to decision making. 

(this is kind of a funny point of comparison here, for me, as a gamer. I stuck with fighters in Dungeons and Dragons at the beginning, because of their lack of complication and their perceived ease. In Shadowrun, which we play once a week, I've been playing a Decker, which many other people at the table think is the hardest role to play. It's interesting, to see how different systems might appeal to you differently, and also to realize and recognize how you might have grown and changed as a gamer)

Places I've been "published"

Well, okay, not really published. But put up publicly where total strangers can take in my work.

I already told you about Housekeeping, my science fiction short story that my good buddy Jacob narrated and put up on Soundcloud. If you like what you hear, you should follow him on Facebook. He'd probably like that.

Now I've got another "credit", wherein my buddy Dave, who we game with weekly if not more frequently, has shared my piece on his blog. He's been doing a character journal of our Dungeons and Dragons game, which is the adventure path titled "Age of Worms", published in Dungeon magazine from 2005-2006, and he's graciously opened his blog space up for other players to contribute. My character, Larkin, is the party's fighter.

Quotes around the house (and work)

Housemate: I'm really hungry. But I ate all the cereal.
Me: I'm sorry. Wait, no you didn't, there's rice squares.
Housemate: I don't want rice squares.
Me: Why not? You  can put sprinkles on them!
Housemate: Where do you come from?! 

Coworker: Wait, what are you talking about?
Me: Forensics. Really, what do I ever talk about, other than that, nukes, and dogs. Well, and serial killers. Which is forensics again when you think about it.

While playing D&D (well, Pathfinder):
Me (to housemate): That's right, I hit your box!
Tim: You can't hit her box back.
Mahria: That's not a friendly square.

Me: You don't understand me!
Fiancé: Oh, I understand what you're saying. I just never know why, or what you're doing exactly. 

Me: Well, that's a nice little town. Apartments there might be cheaper, too.
Coworker: Yeah, but they had that murder suicide there recently.
Me: They did, but those things are usually pretty self contained.
Coworker: I guess they are, but there is definitely something wrong with you.

Me: According to this, apparently Funny Foam has/had butane in it.
Coworker: Maybe that explains the things you're interested in.

This Book Will Change Your Life

Occasionally, somebody will refer to a book and sigh, "that book changed my life." I nod, like I know what they're talking about, but I really tend to be thinking "...really?"

Frequently, I've read the book as well. Life of Pi? Didn't change my life. Neither did The Kite Runner, though it made me profoundly frustrated and angry. The Help? Nope.

Maybe The Fountainhead did, to a small degree, but maybe I don't want to make declarations like that here.

Maybe life-changing ability isn't what I read books for. Maybe, because I also write books, I don't look at them as mystical tomes that hold profound answers. I love to read, anybody who knows me will be able to attest to that (and if they aren't able, I guess they don't know me), but maybe what I want to get out of a book isn't what others seek.

I look for entertainment in books. When I open a book, I certainly do want it to take me away for a little while. Books are education, books are thought exercises, books are fantasy, books are time travel. American Gods, by Neil Gaiman, contained things I'd never thought of before. I'm looking forward to reading the anniversary edition, which I've brought home from the library yet again. Did American Gods change my life? Not more than The Fountainhead, anyway.

So really, I do feel that a book's job is to create an immersive world that I go and visit for a little while. No more, no less, though really, that's a pretty tall order. A book that I continue to think about after I've closed it, that's a good book. The Hobbit and Lord of the Rings both take place in a complete world of Tolkein's creation. They have been, and will continue to be, popular for just that reason. The movies have only added to that, and with The Hobbit releasing trailers, will continue to.

Tabletop fantasy role playing games indeed owe a profound debt to Tolkein (well, and war gamers), because the world he created still has such a profound effect on the fantasy worlds that are created today. Indeed, "traditional fantasy" makes one think of elves, and orcs, and goblins, swords and sorcery. Urban fantasy frequently has these elements as well.

So yeah. The book that changed my life? Well, it's a few I guess, but one of them was referred to as The Player's Handbook, and was 3rd edition Dungeons and Dragons, published by Wizards of the Coast. Before I had friends who had that book, and others, I didn't know. I didn't know that, other than in theatre, people came together to tell a story together, acting out characters who have no scripts but very certainly have specific roles. I didn't know about White Wolf either, publishers of The World of Darkness, old and new.

Gaming can be better than workshopping. Gaming can fuel the fire to write, within those consensual worlds, and in others of your creation. It can make you push your boundaries and test the edges of trust, and make you think hard about the decisions that you're willing to make.  As a writer, it's been a blessing to me, and a good game is equivalent to a good book.

D&D, unfortunately, moved to other editions, and 4th edition is where Wizards of the Coast and my gaming group parted ways. We're partial to Pathfinder, now, by Paizo publishing. It maintains that spirit of the game, the traditions of orcs and elves and goblins, and wizards with staves casting spells.