March came in like a lion and is still an lion and

We had cold temperatures and snow all through March, as though the season was making up for mild (ish?) weather in December. (Not in January. January sucked.) But, birds are starting to come back, and some sad confused little crocuses bloomed next to the library building, so hopefully spring asserts itself, well, soon.

I'd already mentioned that A.C. Wise reviewed "A Thing With Feathers" in her Words For Thought blog on Apex, and Maria Haskins also reviewed it on her blog! I am forever pleased that people like my words, and I am forever grateful to those writers for reviewing them. Also, importantly, they do seem to really see and understand what I'm getting at.

I had no new acceptances in March, and am eagerly awaiting my Escape Pod publication of "Surveillance Fatigue" in a week and a half or so. Also, big news, the Hugo Award nominations were announced yesterday and Escape Pod is on that list!

Something to consider, if you like reading the darker end of science fiction and fantasy: The Dark is Kickstarting funding for their next two years. They publish amazing materials, and would like to increase the amount of money they pay their writers. Also, at the higher end of the rewards, there are things like a story critique by Nin Harris, a lovely writer and a PhD holding teacher and scholar, so if you're writer and have those kinds of funds laying around, don't miss this chance!

Also, as it is April 1, Camp NaNoWriMo has (in theory) commenced. I don't have writing plans this month, strictly, but rather rewriting plans. I'm going through Learn to Howl once more with feeling, in order to fix setting issues and some places where the story sags, and hopefully I can get this thing published this year!


And, last but not least, my Writer Friend Tori Curtis (of Eelgrass fame) has had her short story "Upon Your Marriage to a Redcap" published in Iridium Zine. It's a delightful story that I've known through various iterations, and I'm happy that it's found a home!

Looking back on January 2017: how'd I do?

White rabbits!

It's February already!

January went well. I wrote a story, currently titled "The Mountain's Wife", and really it might just stay that way. It's not quite ready to be sent out yet...there's something it needs, and I'm not sure what. So it waits.

I also got over my "reader's block" a bit and read three books! I've added the pages "Readings 2017", and I'm keeping track not only of the books I've read, but also the short stories, poems, and longer articles. I realized that for one, even when I'm not finishing books it doesn't mean I'm entirely not reading and two, it'd be nice to keep track of those great stories, etc. that I read for if/when I want to refer back to them.

The book I read most recently was Eelgrass, by Tori Curtis , who blogs here and tweets here and is in my writing group, so I did kind of cheat by being able to read/hear some of the novel before it was published. Also, I did a livetweet as I read, which I've collected via Storify.

So, if you like fantasy, and selkies, and the ocean, and #ownvoices novels, definitely have a look at Eelgrass (currently available in paperback and on Kindle).

December 2016 and year end wrap up

Well, 2016, I hope you're happy with yourself. What a year. Everybody knows what I mean so we won't get into that because I don't want to and you can't make me.

So let's talk about writing! On January 1 of this year, I talked about my goals for 2016. I did not do the Book Riot Read Harder challenge, and actually only read 14 books this year. Lots of short stories, though. So I've got a goal related to that for 2017 that I'll squeeze another blog post out of.

September 2016 Goals Roundup

Well. September seemed like a reallllly long month to me. You?

Lots of writing in September. A lot of it was Shadowrun writing (not the same character as in "A Shadowrun Story" which, improbably, has become one of the most popular posts on this blog, but a character with similar elements. She's also a decker, for one. It goes from there), and some of it was workshop writing, as my writing workshop has begun again. Workshop writing is not always complete, though I do have one flash piece to show for it, and what we did today (which is October 1, and will not count for my September goals, mais oui).

Just Writer Things: Reading

So this week, I was invited to do my first reading under the auspices of being a Published Author. My local arts council has a writer's salon once monthly, with an open mic first, and a published author to round it out. This month's published author became ill and had to cancel, and they called me!

It was an interesting experience, and a positive one. The crowd was somewhat small, and seemed very receptive, overall. I read the entirety of "The Lion and the Dragonslayer" (published in Mosaics 2). I'm not sure how long it took me, but it was long enough that I could feel when I was rushing myself and try to slow it down. I stumbled over words sometimes, but so did everybody else, so whatever. I was also, once again, reminded of the value of reading one's work out loud as an editing tool. Mostly, there are a few words I would've cut just because of redundancy or clumsiness, and I left some of those words out in the writing.

I also really understand the value of WATER. About halfway through I became acutely aware of my thirst, but I had not previously grabbed a bottle of water and didn't want to interrupt myself so I soldiered on. The podium was also somewhat small, and I was already somewhat leaning on it (not the best approach) and also resting my paperback copy on it (this worked out better, but I really need to get contact lenses again. I kept having to reposition my glasses, and I know that little gestures like that when one is on stage seem like terrible fidgets).

There was a little Q&A afterwards (which I took a bottle of water for), which was interesting. I was able to confirm I have had more "The Lion" stories planned, actually. I'd only ever finished one other, but I should read it back ove and edit it, and finish others. Definitely something to look towards for information, as time goes on.

All in all, I was very happy to be invited to read, and very happy to do the reading. I thought it went well, and that everybody stayed engaged throughout my little adventure story.

Mosaics 2 now available!

I announced my acceptance into Mosaics 2: a Collection of Independent Women back in February, and the time has finally come. It's here, it's here!

The Kindle date still appears to be May 1, but if you want to order the paperback, you could have it by Wednesday! Isn't it lovely, sometimes, to be living in The World of Tomorrow?

My included story is "The Lion and the Dragonslayer": when the village of Orford asked for help with a dragon, they didn't expect the king to send a woman, no matter how big her sword is.

(I was particularly pleased with my little story blurb there; I typically struggle quite a lot with producing an interesting summary of literally anything, much less what I've written.)

In conjunction with this publication, I've created a Goodreads author profile . I hope to see titles of other anthologies, and my own books, attached to it pretty soon!

Obviously, I encourage you to get the Kindle or paperback of Mosaics 2 (or get it from your local library! And request that your library orders it; mine is, as volume 1, anyway, was available through the book distributor Ingram) and I also encourage (entreat?) you to review it on Goodreads and/or Amazon. Every time you review a book, an author gets its wings. Or something.

Book Review: The Big Rewind, by Libby Cudmore

I'm one of those people who hopes to always have a tape deck. I have mixtapes I made through the years, things on cassette I have access to in no other medium, that kind of thing. And when I heard the premise of Libby Cudmore's The Big Rewind, and saw the cover, I knew I had to read it.

(Disclaimer: I also know Libby; she's one of my few in person Writer Friends)

(Cover image linked from the Harper Collins site)

Book Brownies (the fae kind, not chocolates)

A couple of times in the past year, I've had a strange sort of book luck.

See, we have a book sale at the library, both for items the library itself has withdrawn and also for donated items. Books are a dollar, fifty cents if they're trade paperbacks. You might imagine I come home with more book sale books than I ought, though I do try to exercise a measure of control.

Two times in the past year, I've walked past the book sale and found the exact book I was looking for, for the low low bargain price of one George Washington.

Two Year Anniversary

Two years ago, I wrote the Pilot post of this blog.

At the time, I was under contract to publish an anthology of short stories with a small press. The date kept getting pushed back, though, and then the publisher went on hiatus. So I asked for my rights back. Said publisher seems to not be operating as such any longer. So, I guess I dodged a bullet?

I started this blog with the purpose of "building my platform", getting people interested in my writing, et cetera. My intent for this blog has always been more than Buy My Book! shilling, though. I wrapped up that very first post saying

"I feel that a good writer needs to read.  I believe that a good writer learns about the world, and never stops learning, regardless of whether there's a classroom. Writing, authoring, is a process and a journey, and I hope you enjoy coming with me. "

I still believe these things; it's one reason I'll post on seemingly random topics, like black market rhino horns and James Bond's pants. They're things I've learned about, and find interesting, and all of that is story fodder. I will probably never write a story that revolves around said pants or rhinos, but it might come up in conversation. I might throw it in for flavor, a cultural reference instead of a literary one.

So, to those of you who are still reading, thank you! To those of you who are new, thank you and welcome! I hope you enjoy my crazy train of thought here, and I hope to one day be able to write a post in which I do, in fact, suggest that you buy my book.

James Bond's pants and the nature of suffering

I feel less bad for my inadvertent shoe hoard when I discover things like a blog devoted to James Bond's clothing. Which James Bond? Well, all of them of course. Including "Literary Bond". Ah, the Internet. Something for everybody.

Now, I'm not a huge James Bond fan. I watched....one of the Pierce Brosnan ones. I don't even know which one. There was a brunette, and a red car I think. I watched some of the Sean Connery ones when they were on TV in the summer while I was in high school, but I don't remember which ones. In all honesty, I probably just had the TV on while I was busy writing my tremendously bad fantasy novel.

I do like the Daniel Craig Bond films. I haven't seen Skyfall yet (NO SPOILERS) but I watched the others on DVD in the comfort of my home. I think I even own Quantum of Solace for some reason. I haven't read any of the Bond novels yet, though I did read Chitty Chitty Bang Bang, which was by Ian Fleming as well. The movie's casting has a bit of an in-joke, actually, as three James Bond movie actors were in it as well, confirmed by IMDB: Desmond Llwelyn, who played Q, Gert Fröbe who was Goldfinger, and Anna Quayle who was in the original Casino Royale.

The Bond stories are fairly compelling, though. Suave hero guy gets the girl (mostly), kicks some ass, and solves......well, whatever it is he's solving. My main detraction for the Craig ones is that there are. So. Many. Chase. Scenes. In cars. On Goddamn boats. On foot. People are fleeing James Bond, and he is after them, like one of the Queen's hunting hounds. I mean, I assume she has hounds, in addition to Corgis that bark all the time. Coincidentally, our across the street neighbors sometimes have a Corgi that barks all the time, causing Elka to bark as well. It's a grand time.

I will that that the foot chase at the beginning of Quantum of Solace with its parkour was pretty neat, and I had the added bonus of Bear Grylls telling me, while I was watching Man vs. Wild that British Special Forces uses it, prior to him running across a bunch of rocks and stuff. Bear Grylls makes me think of James Bond sometimes, given that they're both British, and also seem to have a stoic need to suffer. Bear Grylls' suffering is poignant, typically enacted when he's eating something horrible for the benefit of the camera. James Bond's is a bit more...visceral (that scene at the end of Casino Royale with the chair and the rope, anyone?)

Now, even though I haven't watched much Bond, as a child, I watched Danger Mouse. Religiously. I even remember the marathon that Nickelodeon had when it was going off the air. I remember watching episodes with my dad, and he didn't watch children's programming just to humor me, he definitely had to be able to stand it. It contains many of the same elements (it's supposed to), and I in fact got the complete collection on DVD from Woot! at some point last year. I haven't rewatched them yet; I'm not sure if they've stood the test of time for me (I know Dinosaurs sure hasn't, boy howdy).

What is it about suffering that makes characters more compelling for us? Fiction is rife with orphaned children, damaged war veterans, rape victims, and widows. So is real life, granted, but even when these things haven't happened to you personally, they seem to perform some strange function wherein they gain the audience's attention and relax the tight grip which we hold on our sympathies. Suffering and what a character does to overcome it seems to make them all the more real to us, evne if they're tux wearing sociopaths in Her Majesty's Service.

Something to relate to

I haven't yet read a book by Hilary Mantel, but after reading Hilary Mantel: By the Book on the New York Times website, I was amused and intrigued. I can definitely relate to having a somewhat strange vocabulary as compared to those around me. I also was largely surrounded by adults, which really inhibited any board game play, let me tell you. People would buy me board games, but then hardly anybody would ever actually play them with me. As an adult now, I can understand. Sometimes it's less than fun to play kid games, even with precocious kids.

Interestingly, also like Hilary Mantel, I received collections of Children's Illustrated Classics for things like Christmas or my birthday, and so was exposed to Great Expectations, Black Beauty (which I don't know how I didn't mention in this post), and others when I was very young. I remember the copy of Kidnapped was misprinted, and so restarted on page 71 or so, and then jumped to 221 in the middle of that, so I've still not read the whole story. I also never revisited Great Expectations, even during my Dickens reading period at 11 or 12.

Mantel recommended a book in her "By the book" article as well (as another author has shown up this week, I guess it's going to be a regular thing in the times. Which is pretty rad, really), entitled Religion and the Decline of Magic, by Keith Thomas, which I feel I must get my hands on. Of course my library system doesn't have it, but the paperback is reasonably priced on Amazon; it's not one of those mythic out of print books you hear about and only see surface every once in awhile for hundreds of dollars.

Top 5 Posts (in my opinion) from Before I was Cool

Of course, that's assuming I'm cool now. But, soldiering onward, here are five posts that I particularly like, for one reason or another, that are in the archives.

1. Where Am I to Go, Now That I've Gone too Far: written when there was a piece floating around on the Interweb about whether Young Adult writing had gotten "too dark" (plus, I like the song the title is pulled from. "Twilight Zone", by Golden Earring. You should listen to it.)

2.  Notes to Myself: Self explanatory. I still do this, as bad if not worse. I have a blog post in the making regarding the belongings I cleared out of the laptop bag prior to the one I own now (you know, the Thomas Dunne bag!)

3. Brain Tricks: Written soon after the Sandy Hook shootings took place, though not really about that specific incident.

4. Putting Yourself in Their Shoes (or Head) ~Schizophrenia: This one apparently gets Google searched a lot (the topic, anyway. Not my blog specifically).


5. City in Ruins: Wherein I talk about my "favorite" abandoned city. Because of course I have one of those. It would be rather odd not to.

On Derek Walcott and Inspiration

I went to see Derek Walcott read.

He came to my alma mater, and it was a nice excuse to get out of work for a day (because everything in the world I want to do typically happens within my working hours).  I confess, I was largely unfamiliar with his work, though that was all right; he read from his most recent book, White Egrets.

I was interested to learn, during the introductory speeches, that Mr. Walcott actually had something of a long relationship with Hartwick College. He'd written a play, Ghost Dance, for the Cardboard Alley Players, directed in 1989 by Duncan Smith, who was still in the theater department at the time of my attendance. I wasn't a theater person, not really; I auditioned for things, I knew a lot of theater people, I belonged to CAP freshman and sophomore years (interestingly, the slogan on our t-shirts was "Get off your high horse and ride the pony"). Rubbing shoulders with fame and all that (history? Giants?)

I took notes through the reading, because I thought I'd be a good doobie and blog about it. Of course a number of weeks has passed, and of course my notes are nearly incomprehensible. I got down something of a "set list", but since he read only from White Egrets, it's unnecessary to relate here. It was my first real poetry reading, and it was interesting for a number of reasons. The college president, newly elected a couple of years ago, gave a speech that could literally have preceded any "creative" visitor. One of my former writing professors gave a considerably better one, having (one assumes) previously interacted with Mr. Walcott.

When Mr. Walcott read, he did so in a straightforward manner. He paged through to the poems he was going to use, did not patter in between, and engaged in no theatrics. He made the occasional wry comment; "As you get older, you write more elegies." When he came upon yet another, he said "Oh, here we go." It was a situation in which most of the room seemed not to know if it was permissible to laugh. I did.

There was a short question session before they let him off the stage. One professor I did not take classes with went on about his use of light in his poems, and asked about painters he admired. One student said that she was interested in poetry again, because of him. One student asked where he got his inspiration, which gave me pause.

We're in the room with a Nobel prize winner, having just heard scraps of wonderment from his lips, and you're asking him about inspiration?

I wonder if some people think inspiration is a rare beast, the white whale that we Ahab writers quest after across the years, braving storm tossed seas and certain death in order to fling that harpoon and yes, finally find flesh. I wonder if some people are enamored with the idea of writing, but don't much write themselves, and hold dear to their breast the idea "If only I had the inspiration." I wonder if some people never write at all, only read, and wonder at these bright things writers put on the page, these bits of sea glass that we cannot recreate, only pick up and wonder at in the sun. I say all of this not to make fun, but in wonderment of my own.

Mr. Walcott's answer was the beauty around him. He came from Saint Lucia, a beautiful place, still a young place finding its voice, and how such a thing was very fulfilling.

One of the last questions was a young man, asking Mr. Walcott's advice to young writers. In another moment of muted laughter, Derek Walcott deadpanned "Don't do it." After we quieted, he said "No, I don't mean that. The elation you feel, you still have it. But you should learn humility. Don't be arrogant, or suicidal."

Smutception

Look, a Fifty Shades Generator! (totally raunchy and ridiculous and NSFW or whatever the hell. But if you're online at work, I salute and envy you. I can kind of go online at work, but it's mostly to look at stuff on Amazon [for when people are all "I'm looking for a book. I don't remember the title or author. The cover might be blue? It came out last year. Maybe it has 'nights' in the title'?" Some of these I magically know {the above is Blue Nights, by Joan Didion}, but seriously people? If you don't remember anything about it, how the fuck do you know you want to read it? Pick something else! AT RANDOM. It'll be just as good. Or bad. {But that reminds me, I wanted to read Slouching Towards Bethlehem by her. So thanks, guys!}])


(You can rent paperbacks on Amazon? Oh what the hell. Go to the fucking library.)

Words Unsaid

Once I discovered that I could read books for myself, I was no longer at the mercy of my family readers. I picked my own books and reveled in the luxury of being able to read them --- myself --- whenever I wanted. However long I wanted. I in fact used to get in trouble, at home and at school, for "reading too much". At least I wasn't out robbing old people, right?

Reading only to myself resulted in an exponential total books read. It's also resulted in my knowing words that I do not, in fact, know how to pronounce. People don't use them. Seriously. "Wont" was a word Jack London used a lot in Call of the Wild; not many eight year olds hear that in everyday use. "Wan" is another one.

What about Latin? You know, the dead language? How exactly do you say "vici", of "Veni, Vidi, Vici?" Is it like "victim" or is it like "vice"? It's hard to talk about a show Doberman you like (Protocol's Veni Vidi Vici) when you can't actually pronounce the whole of her registered name; her call name is Fifi.

It's hard to sound cool reciting Ginsberg's "Howl" from memory if you trip up at the word "dynamo" (it's pretty early on, if you're not in the know).

I also try very hard to say peoples' names correctly. At work, I'm the one who makes the library's phone calls to people who have available holds. I'm occasionally confronted with a first name I have never seen before, or heard. Or heard of. When possible, I Google it and listen to a pronunciation of it (a few baby names web sites have this, apparently. Thank God.) Sometimes even that doesn't work, and then I pray for a voicemail. That way, I can say "An item you ordered" instead of butchering their given name.

I try to keep these things in mind while I'm writing. I say sentences out loud, to see how they fit together. I ask myself if I've picked the fifty cent word, instead of the one that people will be more familiar with. I ask myself if I've picked a ridiculous name, that nobody will actually know how to pronounce. I've read entire books without knowing how to say one of the main character's names. Case in point, L. M. Montgomer's Emily of New Moon trilogy; I know how to say Emily, obviously, but her best friend's name is Ilse. Do you say it kind of like "Isles", the other word for islands? Do you use a hard "i", as with the word "Is"? Is the "e" at the end pronounced in an "a" manner (like Elsa, but with an I?) Of course, if I watched the television series (it's on Hulu), I'd have the answer already.

Someday never comes

Sometimes I read a lot. Sometimes it takes me a long time to get through a book.

Sometimes I don't write for months. Others, I have a project going that I really focus on and really make headway with. Sometimes it's multiple projects.

Right now in the rubrick, I'm in the "not really reading, writing a lot" portion. I started a werewolf novel in April that's coming to its climax. I started a new writing project involving horror short stories. With June coming up, I'm trying to get myself to actually outline my CampNaNoWriMo novel.

I know I'm doing a space scifi thing. I know that the main characters are two sisters, and that there's at least one dude (no, this is not going to be a love triangle). I know some aesthetics of the space world that I'm operating with, and even though it's in space, it'll be on a smaller, character driven scale. But story? Eh, I've got an idea of the conflict. I think.

So, I need an outline, or else I'll be dead in the water at 10k words.

In NaNo lingo, I'm typically what's known as a "pantser", i.e. I write by the seat of my pants. I also typically have a story arc in mind, though, a culminating event, how I want things to shake out, that kind of thing. I wish I knew that already, this time. I'd really like for this to work out, and I'm always up for a NaNo!

This Book Will Change Your Life

Occasionally, somebody will refer to a book and sigh, "that book changed my life." I nod, like I know what they're talking about, but I really tend to be thinking "...really?"

Frequently, I've read the book as well. Life of Pi? Didn't change my life. Neither did The Kite Runner, though it made me profoundly frustrated and angry. The Help? Nope.

Maybe The Fountainhead did, to a small degree, but maybe I don't want to make declarations like that here.

Maybe life-changing ability isn't what I read books for. Maybe, because I also write books, I don't look at them as mystical tomes that hold profound answers. I love to read, anybody who knows me will be able to attest to that (and if they aren't able, I guess they don't know me), but maybe what I want to get out of a book isn't what others seek.

I look for entertainment in books. When I open a book, I certainly do want it to take me away for a little while. Books are education, books are thought exercises, books are fantasy, books are time travel. American Gods, by Neil Gaiman, contained things I'd never thought of before. I'm looking forward to reading the anniversary edition, which I've brought home from the library yet again. Did American Gods change my life? Not more than The Fountainhead, anyway.

So really, I do feel that a book's job is to create an immersive world that I go and visit for a little while. No more, no less, though really, that's a pretty tall order. A book that I continue to think about after I've closed it, that's a good book. The Hobbit and Lord of the Rings both take place in a complete world of Tolkein's creation. They have been, and will continue to be, popular for just that reason. The movies have only added to that, and with The Hobbit releasing trailers, will continue to.

Tabletop fantasy role playing games indeed owe a profound debt to Tolkein (well, and war gamers), because the world he created still has such a profound effect on the fantasy worlds that are created today. Indeed, "traditional fantasy" makes one think of elves, and orcs, and goblins, swords and sorcery. Urban fantasy frequently has these elements as well.

So yeah. The book that changed my life? Well, it's a few I guess, but one of them was referred to as The Player's Handbook, and was 3rd edition Dungeons and Dragons, published by Wizards of the Coast. Before I had friends who had that book, and others, I didn't know. I didn't know that, other than in theatre, people came together to tell a story together, acting out characters who have no scripts but very certainly have specific roles. I didn't know about White Wolf either, publishers of The World of Darkness, old and new.

Gaming can be better than workshopping. Gaming can fuel the fire to write, within those consensual worlds, and in others of your creation. It can make you push your boundaries and test the edges of trust, and make you think hard about the decisions that you're willing to make.  As a writer, it's been a blessing to me, and a good game is equivalent to a good book.

D&D, unfortunately, moved to other editions, and 4th edition is where Wizards of the Coast and my gaming group parted ways. We're partial to Pathfinder, now, by Paizo publishing. It maintains that spirit of the game, the traditions of orcs and elves and goblins, and wizards with staves casting spells.

A Different Language

I was a reader before I was a writer.

When I was little, I loved to be read to. My grandmother got me a beautiful edition of Rudyard Kipling's Just So Stories, perhaps because it was Kipling and because it was beautiful, but she didn't think that at that age (4? 5?) I'd have the fortitude to sit through an entire story before bedtime.

She was incorrect.

Once the Seal is Broken

This may or may not offend you.

When I have a new hoodie, I try to put off washing it for as long as possible. For one, I'm a freak and like the "new clothes" smell. Far more than the "new car" smell, in fact, which instead of filling me with pleasure and a sense of pride, leaves me vaguely nauseous. Obviously, if the hoodie gets something on it or smells bad in any way, I'll wash it, I'm not one of those weirdos who freezes their Levis in lieu of applying soap (though again, jeans get washed if they smell or have something on them. Similar principle, but more importantly, worn jeans fit better and are more comfortable. This is not science. This is my life). But it's always a sad thing. The fleece is never so soft and velvety, once washed, as it was new. The strings get weird, the inevitable shrinking starts to occur.

Now how am I going to relate this to books?

Pilot

Beginnings are often awkward.

We don't know each other yet, don't know each other's habits, and perhaps don't yet know what to say. So here, I'll go first.

My name is Jennifer, though I prefer Jen. I've been making up stories for as long as I can remember, and I eventually began writing them down. I wrote a very bad fantasy novel during high school, which will not see the light of day. Since then, I've written, and started, other novels that I think are rather better. Since 2007, I've participated in National Novel Writing Month, which is a challenge to write a 50,000 word novel in the 30 days of November.

I plan on sharing my writing process here, and also discussing books and stories in general.  I've always been a big reader, frequently getting in trouble for it as I grew up. Even now, I read between 100 and 200 books a year, my "habit" fostered by my job at a library. I love fantasy and science fiction, and also good old fashioned "literary" fiction.

I feel that a good writer needs to read.  I believe that a good writer learns about the world, and never stops learning, regardless of whether there's a classroom. Writing, authoring, is a process and a journey, and I hope you enjoy coming with me.